Difficult personalities and how to overcome them in your experience

August 6, 2018

 Good morning and happy Monday! I hope you are coming off of a fun, relaxing weekend and that you're geared up for a productive and exciting week.

 

Last week, we discussed the subject of pursuing your dream job along with the why's, do' an dont's of that ever-so-important pursuit of achieving that which we want to experience in our personal and professional lives -- our purpose. I mentioned in last week's FB LIVE, the importance of researching the job, industry and even the company names that you've always dreamed of pursuing. Reading the reviews and commentary about these organizations from the people who previously held the position you're trying to land, is helpful in preparing you for the interview and ultimately, in understanding what the expectations are.

 

Many working women run into the issues of misogyny, the good ol' boys club, and/or lack of diversity in male-dominated industries (i.e. logistics/supply chain, law practices). Other industries with heavy presence of female professionals run into office politics, power struggles and lack of emotional intelligence within the management team (i.e. human resources, health/beauty). Why is this important to know upfront? Because, as you do your research on your next desired promotion or transition, it's important to know what you may encounter and how you're going to re-frame your experience if/when you are offered the position.

 

Like most working moms, you have to make sincere efforts to manage your time, anxiety levels, and attention/focus on what truly matters to you. You want to thrive at work and at home. You want to excel in our strengths, professionally, while maintaining a harmonious and happy home life, personally. As a woman, you likely already know what makes you tick and what makes you cringe. Understanding this about yourself helps you know what type of hobbies you enjoy, the friendships you cultivate, and what you choose to spend your time and energy focusing on. This is a really great space to examine your Impostor Syndrome UCON (unique cocktail of needs), so that you can identify your competencies and triggers, as you re-frame your experience. If you know what personality/leadership types would inspire you, and which ones would deter you - you can then use that information to actively pursue these experiences in your next transition.

 

Look out for the leadership styles that negatively impact your experience. If you enjoy working with Type-A's because they understand your drive; that's a great place to seek a connection. If Type-A managers stirs up your anxiety levels, then use that information to either pursue a different opportunity or challenge the status quo. Passive-aggressive management styles lead to confusion, poor teamwork morale, and increased turnover. People need a leader, someone they can follow. When a manager is passive-aggressive in his/her leadership style, it leaves room for things like office politics and adversarial relationships to creep in. Both scenarios can lead to unwanted stress; as your mind tries to make sense of it all.

 

As a working woman, you must take proper care of yourself so that you can then properly take care of everything and everyone you are responsible for. Stress from work can carry over into your home life, stealing away your joy, mental health and ability to stay present with yourself, family and friends. This is why, in order to thrive in all areas of your life, it's important to actively participate in controlling your environment. Knowing what personality types negatively impact your day-to-day flow, will help you understand what type of leader/manager you'd prefer to work under and what company culture best fits your unique set of values.

 

For example, with the changes I've made in my life over the last 3 years, I seek to work under managers that are conducive and supportive of my work ethic, style and balance. That means, I prefer to work with managers who are high on the emotional intelligence spectrum, value contribution without harping on perfectionism, value output quality instead of time spent, and understand/support my focus on wellness and family. The reason I seek out managers who fit this mold now is because I'm already my own drill sergeant. I don't need someone else, outside of me constantly reminding me of my to-do list, why I need to do them, and how important they each are. Working under the Type-A manager in prior years, certainly pushed me to do better, do more, and ensure that I made every best decision possible. But the cost to my peace and health was just too much to sustain long-term. Now having transitioned in my career and learned what it's like to work under a different, more approachable manager; I've learned so much about myself. 

 

This is why YOU must identify what personality types and environments are detrimental to your growth and use that info to decide your next move:

1) avoid the job/industry/firm altogether

2) challenge the status quo and influence change

 

For help in identifying your UCON (unique cocktail of needs) and what personality types/environments would best suit your growth potential, schedule a free strategy session with me by going to www.michellemgomez.com/contact to secure a date & time for our chat.

 

Another FREE resources is the valuable content I share weekly in my private group. Join me in my private FB group, Dare To Be Great, where we will provide training on this matter during our weekly Thoughtful Thursday broadcasts at 7pm PST.

 

To join our group, go to https://www.facebook.com/groups/224488874989905/ and submit your add request. Please be sure to answer the three short questions in order to be approved.

 

You do not have to succumb to tyrants and toxic environments in the name of success. You have a choice to prioritize your experience because it will positively impact the organization that you select to share your talents with.

 

Choose you, first.

 

Peace & Blessings,

Michelle Gomez

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